Martin Luther in preaching on the Bible’s command to be fruitful and multiply said “As it is not within my power not to be a man, so it is not my prerogative to be without a woman. Again, as it is not in your power not to be a woman, so it is not your prerogative to be without a man. For it is not a matter of free choice or decision but a natural and necessary thing, that whatever is a man must have a woman and whatever is a woman must have a man. For this word which God speaks, “Be fruitful and multiply,” is not a command. It is more than a command, namely, a divine ordinance which it is not our prerogative to hinder or ignore. Rather, it is just as necessary as the fact that I am a man, and more necessary than sleeping and waking, eating and drinking, and emptying the bowels and bladder. It is a nature and disposition just as innate as the organs involved in it. Therefore, just as God does not command anyone to be a man or a woman but creates them the way they have to be, so he does not command them to multiply but creates them so that they have to multiply. And wherever men try to resist this, it remains irresistible nonetheless and goes its way through fornication, adultery, and secret sins, for this is a matter of nature and not of choice.”
Marriage is the expected norm for most people. Jesus said only three type of people can forgo marriage, those who are eunuchs by birth, those who are made eunuchs by violence, and those whom are made eunuchs in service to the Kingdom of God, in other words those who are called by God and equipped by God to celibacy. Luther again says “Such persons are rare, not one in a thousand, for they are a special miracle of God. No one should venture on such a life unless he be specifically called by God, like Jeremiah.” Therefore, most people are called by God to marriage and obedience to the first command given to man, “Be fruitful and multiply.”
Many, today, are sadly walking away from marriage altogether or delaying it through the prime ages of their lives. Some of this is through unfaithfulness to God and ungodly fear. Some of this is because of immaturity and selfishness. And some of this is because unpreparedness.
If most young men and women are called to marriage, than preparation for this calling should start early in life just as preparation for other aspects of their adult life is starting. Fathers can and should work to prepare their sons to be the kind of man who can take initiative to find a wife and to keep her. The following list is not exhaustive but is a helpful start for a young man or a father of boys to help prepare them for marriage. This list is not in any particular order.
1. Get in Shape. Exercise and watch what you eat. Take care of how you dress. While women don’t rely on the physical as much as men are naturally inclined to, a man still wants to be attractive to a woman. He also wants to be able to protect her physically as well as be honorable in his appearance. Don’t be a slob.
2. Watch How you Treat Your Mom. The way you treat your mother is indicative of how you may treat a woman. Do you show your mother respect? Do you hold the door open for her when she comes into church? God has given you women in your life already that you can treat in a godly manner.
3. Be a hard worker and work as to the Lord (Colossians 3:23). Find ways you can contribute to the value of your family now. Think about ways you can be productive at your age. Example: lawn care business.
4. Become competent in your work (Proverbs 22:29). Study what other skilled men do and learn them. If your Father isn’t as competent, Youtube is your friend. Someone once said, “if they don’t find you handsome let them find you handy.”
5. Take on Responsibility. So many young men today behave as if they're wearing a giant sign that says, "Don't depend on me or tie me down." We've falsely believed that "freedom" means not having to answer to anyone. Get Up early. Look out for your brothers in the Church. Be willing to take on a responsibility that no one else wants such as cleaning the church building.
6. Develop Financial Discipline: Learn how to use money instead of being used by it. Proverbs 22:7
7. Keep yourself Pure- "But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Matthew 5:28 You can start learning to say no to your lusts by saying no to dessert. You can have it from time to time, but find ways to say no to your appetites and therefore develop self-control.
8. Learn how to talk to women: You need manners but also courage. Too many godly young men are afraid of women. They don’t know how to talk to them. Mistakes in talking to women: a. Assume they are like men and will like all your silly humor or odd interests. b. Overshare. This goes with the next step but you have to leave room for interest. c. Unload all their problems on the woman. Treat a woman like a mom or a counselor. d. Don’t listen. Or if they do listen, they want to immediately jump to how to solve problems rather than to hear them. Watch this video, laugh and learn. e. Can’t read cues. Women will signal if they are interested.
9. Be interesting- Don’t be a one trick pony. Develop different interests. To be interesting you need to be interested. In addition, have some mystery about you.
10. Have a Mission- Have a purpose for your life. Don’t make the woman your mission. You can’t be desperate. But instead as you seek God’s vocation for your life, be on the lookout for a woman you can invite to come along with you on the mission.
Marriage is the expected norm for most people. Jesus said only three type of people can forgo marriage, those who are eunuchs by birth, those who are made eunuchs by violence, and those whom are made eunuchs in service to the Kingdom of God, in other words those who are called by God and equipped by God to celibacy. Luther again says “Such persons are rare, not one in a thousand, for they are a special miracle of God. No one should venture on such a life unless he be specifically called by God, like Jeremiah.” Therefore, most people are called by God to marriage and obedience to the first command given to man, “Be fruitful and multiply.”
Many, today, are sadly walking away from marriage altogether or delaying it through the prime ages of their lives. Some of this is through unfaithfulness to God and ungodly fear. Some of this is because of immaturity and selfishness. And some of this is because unpreparedness.
If most young men and women are called to marriage, than preparation for this calling should start early in life just as preparation for other aspects of their adult life is starting. Fathers can and should work to prepare their sons to be the kind of man who can take initiative to find a wife and to keep her. The following list is not exhaustive but is a helpful start for a young man or a father of boys to help prepare them for marriage. This list is not in any particular order.
1. Get in Shape. Exercise and watch what you eat. Take care of how you dress. While women don’t rely on the physical as much as men are naturally inclined to, a man still wants to be attractive to a woman. He also wants to be able to protect her physically as well as be honorable in his appearance. Don’t be a slob.
2. Watch How you Treat Your Mom. The way you treat your mother is indicative of how you may treat a woman. Do you show your mother respect? Do you hold the door open for her when she comes into church? God has given you women in your life already that you can treat in a godly manner.
3. Be a hard worker and work as to the Lord (Colossians 3:23). Find ways you can contribute to the value of your family now. Think about ways you can be productive at your age. Example: lawn care business.
4. Become competent in your work (Proverbs 22:29). Study what other skilled men do and learn them. If your Father isn’t as competent, Youtube is your friend. Someone once said, “if they don’t find you handsome let them find you handy.”
5. Take on Responsibility. So many young men today behave as if they're wearing a giant sign that says, "Don't depend on me or tie me down." We've falsely believed that "freedom" means not having to answer to anyone. Get Up early. Look out for your brothers in the Church. Be willing to take on a responsibility that no one else wants such as cleaning the church building.
6. Develop Financial Discipline: Learn how to use money instead of being used by it. Proverbs 22:7
7. Keep yourself Pure- "But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Matthew 5:28 You can start learning to say no to your lusts by saying no to dessert. You can have it from time to time, but find ways to say no to your appetites and therefore develop self-control.
8. Learn how to talk to women: You need manners but also courage. Too many godly young men are afraid of women. They don’t know how to talk to them. Mistakes in talking to women: a. Assume they are like men and will like all your silly humor or odd interests. b. Overshare. This goes with the next step but you have to leave room for interest. c. Unload all their problems on the woman. Treat a woman like a mom or a counselor. d. Don’t listen. Or if they do listen, they want to immediately jump to how to solve problems rather than to hear them. Watch this video, laugh and learn. e. Can’t read cues. Women will signal if they are interested.
9. Be interesting- Don’t be a one trick pony. Develop different interests. To be interesting you need to be interested. In addition, have some mystery about you.
10. Have a Mission- Have a purpose for your life. Don’t make the woman your mission. You can’t be desperate. But instead as you seek God’s vocation for your life, be on the lookout for a woman you can invite to come along with you on the mission.
Posted in Main Blog
Recent
Declaration on Children in Worship and the Family Integrated Church Movement
May 30th, 2023
May 21-27th Family Worship Guide
May 18th, 2023
May 14-20 Family Worship Guide
May 11th, 2023
April 30- May 6 Family Worship Guide 2023
April 28th, 2023
When your Husband Doesn't Listen To You
April 19th, 2023
Archive
2023
January
February
March
April
2022
March
June
July
Beyond Authority- ReviewChristian Beauty and SymbolismA Theology of WineBenefits of Being a Covenant ChildAnswering Those Who Say the Bible Supports AbortionLetter to Govenor HolcombConfessions of a Church: Go to ChurchHow to Follow Your HusbandLaundry TipsGrowing into a Titus 2 WomanTraining Children to Help With ChoresDoubting Towards JesusKitchen TipsJuly 10-16th Family Worship Guide 2022Take Care of Your HealthHow to Lead Your Wife Through ChangesFive Memories for the Lord's DayExcuses and Past HurtsJuly 17-23rd Family Worship Guide 2022Confessions of a Church: IdolatryBook Recommendations for Spiritual GrowthJuly 24-30th Family Worship Guide 2022No More ExcusesConfessions of a Church:Justice and GossipJuly 31- August 6th Family Worship Guide 2022
August
Confessions of a Church: Authority and ResponsibilitySovereign King Church Committments While GrowingBe a Member of a Church!Church Membership ExpectationsParenting on SundaysAugust 7-13th Family Worship Guide 2022Confessions of a Church: PriestsWhy Won't My Husband Listen to MeAugust 14-20th Family Worship Guide 2022August 21- 27th Family Worship Guide 2022Confessions of a Church: City of RefugeConfessions of a Church: Tell The FutureHow To Interpret Revelation 20Confessions of a Church: Tattoos for the DeadConfessions of a Church: RejoiceAugust 28-September 3rd Family Worship Guide 2022
September
October
October 2-8th Family Worship Guide 2022Confessions of a Church: Purge the SinOctober 9-15th Family Worship Guide 2022October 16-22nd Family Worship Guide 2022Confessions of a Church: EmasculatedConfessions of a Church: ExcrementOctober 23-29th Family Worship Guide 2022October 30-November 6th Family Worship Guide 2022
November
Categories
Tags
1 Peter 3
2022
Advent
Alcohol
Amill
April 2023
April Family Worship Guide 2023
Art
August 2022
Authority
Beauty
Children in Worship
Children's Ministries
Children
Christmas
Confessions of a Church
December 2022
December Family Worship Guide 2022
Declaration
Deuteronomy
Emasculated
Eschatology
Family Centered Church
Family Centered Family
Family Integrated Church
Family Integrated Worship
Family Worship Guide 2022
Family Worship Guide 2023
Family Worship Guide August 2022
Family Worship Guide July 2022
Family Worship Guide October 2022
Family Worship Guide Septemeber 2022
Father and Mother
February 2023
February Family Worship Guide 2023
Gentle and Quiet
Homeschool
Insurance
January 2023
July 10-16
July 17
July 2022
July 31
Lord's Day
March 2023
May 2023
May Family Worship Guide 2023
November 2022
November Family Worship Guide 2022
October 2022
Parenting
Postmill
Praise
Premill
Private School
Public Worship
Q
Rejoice
Revelation 20
Schism
September 2022
September Family Worship Guide 2022
Sunday School
Symbol
Tattoo
Titus 2 women
Titus 2
Youth Group
abolition
abortion
adultery
answers
apologetics
be a helper
book recommendations
books
child training
chores
church attendance
church membership
cleaning house
cleaning
communication
cooking
covenant child
discipline
doubt
eric holcomb
faith
feminism
fortune telling
growth
help for wives
holiday blues
holiday
homemaking
homosexuality
housekeeping
how to follow your husband
husband
idolatry
incest
infant baptism
kitchen
laundry
lead your wife
letter
mission
new members
prolife
questions
rape
recipes
repent
sabbath
sexual sin
submission
take care of the home
tips for moms
tips for wives
tips
wife and husband
wine
witchcraft
No Comments